


I Miss You

by HowDoYouChooseNotToFeel



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-01
Updated: 2013-11-01
Packaged: 2017-12-31 05:13:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1027643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HowDoYouChooseNotToFeel/pseuds/HowDoYouChooseNotToFeel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock has important news for John.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Miss You

Sherlock smiled at himself, fiddling with the small silver ring in his pocket. It was the perfect size for John and he knew this. Of course he knew this. Sherlock never missed a detail, especially not one involving John. The ring was modest, nothing too expensive. Just like John; simply perfect. Sherlock had never been so hopeful in his life. Never so anticipating. The ring was an engagement ring, meant only for his John.

He took a cab from the jewelry store, telling the cabbie the address of his destination. The address he knew he would never be able to forget, even if he tried. His anticipation just continued to build as the cab drove. He didn’t understand sentiment, and possibly never would. He didn’t care whether that was a good or bad thing, but it didn’t seem to be relevant at that moment in time.

After paying the cabbie, Sherlock got out of the cab and hurried in, smiling as the grave came into view. He approached it and knelt only a few feet from the tombstone that read:

Dr. John Watson  
Loving friend  
Fearless soldier

March 31, 1973 - October 17, 2013

Sherlock remembered the second date as if it were yesterday. The day John left to get the milk from Tesco and was mugged by a group of homophobic men, all much larger than him. He remembered seeing the body of his deceased lover on the examining table of St. Bart’s, seeing the scene play in his mind from just observing the injuries. He knew exactly what had happened without seeing it happen and this almost killed him inside. He remembered Molly turning him around and wiping his tears away in an attempt to comfort him before he finally broke down, clutching John’s lifeless hand in his own. Sobbing that it couldn’t be true.

The consulting detective swallowed thickly and smiled sadly as his fingers gently brushed along the engraved name. “Hello, John...” His baritone voice had a twinge of pain in it, but nevertheless, he smiled, pretending John was there with him. In front of him, smiling back and waving. “I’ve got something for you.” He pulled out the ring and showed it to the tombstone. “I’ve been thinking, and I thought perhaps I would ask if you would like to... Marry me.” He placed the ring on the tombstone and knew John would be chuckling right now at how shy he was being. “Come on, I’m not that awkward.” He chuckled a little. “Consider it, will you? It’d... You’d make me the happiest man ever.”

A moment passed before Sherlock kissed John’s name softly before pressing his head to the tombstone, tears gathering in his eyes. Tears he would never attempt to hold back. “I miss you, John...” He said softly, the tears beginning to fall to the dirt beneath him. “I want you to come back.” He wanted to see the man’s face when he proposed. He wanted to kiss him afterwards; to marry him. Hell, Sherlock just wanted to bury his face in John’s jumper as the other held him close in their bed. But he couldn’t, and he hated that fact. “I dreamt about you last night... I wanted to tell you when I woke up, but you weren’t there...” He cried, clutching to the tombstone now as if it were a lifeline, which was painfully ironic.

Sherlock could almost feel a pair of arms wrap around his waist and a head rest on his back. The smaller form and gentle embrace that could only belong to John. He continued to cry and placed a hand over where he thought he could feel John’s hand and closed his eyes, imagining John was there. “I love you...” He whispered softly.

Maybe it was his own mind playing tricks on him. Perhaps it was just the way the wind blew in his ear. But Sherlock could have sworn he heard John’s voice whisper softly in response, making a smile once again grace his features.

“I love you, too...”


End file.
